Harry Potter and the Polyjuice Potion Problem
by LuthienSilverStar
Summary: HPShakespeare cross. Much Ado About Nothing set with HP characters. Harry has a plan to get Ginny and to set up Ron and Hermione. DracoThe bastard tries to screw everyone over. Will he win?
1. Chapter 1

**Act One**

The day had finally arrived. After months of waiting, it was once again August First. King's Cross was crowded as ever, with Muggles and Magical folk alike.

Following a quick exchange of hugs and well-wishes, Harry, Ron, and Hermione bid fare well to the Weasleys and boarded the Hogwarts Express. A few first years sped past them, and after straightening themselves, the Golden Trio began to look for a compartment to sit in.

"Fancy the fact that all the firsties got seats before us," Ron said under his breath.

"Well, Ron, if you're not fast enough to beat them to it, you really don't deserve a better seat, now do you?" Hermione asked, annoyed.

"Pipe down, you two. Look, this one's mostly empty, so –" Harry began.

"That's my sister's stuff," Ron said, glancing at the trunk and carry-on already in the compartment. "Let's find someplace else." He turned to go.

Hermione grabbed his arm. "I, for one, like your sister, and for that matter, so does Harry." At this Harry deepened to a shade of red rivaling the famous Weasley hair. "You can go somewhere else if you want to, but we're not leaving."

Just then, Ginny returned. "Oh, hullo. Are you all sitting here, then? Great!"

"We were just thinking that." Hermione shot Ron a death glare.

Ron sighed and pulled his trunk inside the compartment. After placing it beside Ginny's on the luggage rack, he helped Hermione with hers.

"Come on, mate," he then said to Harry, "let's go for a walk."

As they walked between train cars, Ron noticed that Harry wasn't really paying attention to him.

"Harry? Harry, hullo?" Ron said, waving his palm in front of Harry's eyes. "What's with you?"

"Oh, nothing," Harry sighed.

"Tell me."

"You wouldn't like it."

"Tell me!"

"I… I don't know how to ask you this, but… Isn't Ginny beautiful?" Harry asked a starry look in his eyes.

"Ew! She's still my sister, no matter – Wait, do you like her?"

Harry blushed again and continued shuffling on, leaving Ron standing gaping at his retreating back.

Snapping out of La-la land, Ron ran to catch up with Harry and clapped his hand upon his best friend's shoulder. "You're my best mate and all – you know that – b –and even though I think Ginny's the most annoying girl ever – but you know I'll hurt you if anything happens to her, right?"

"Yeah, I know," Harry eyed the semi-annoyed look on Ron's face. "Believe me, I know."

"Harry? Ron? 'zat you?"

Harry and Ron turned to see their friend Seanmus Finnigan emerging from a train compartment to their left.

"Hullo, Seanmus."

"Great, we need two more! We're playing wizard's poker. You in?"

Harry looked at Ron, who shrugged. "Sure."

Following Seanmus into the compartment, Harry took a seat beside Neville, who was looking anxiously at Dean Thomas, who was snoring rather loudly.

"Hullo, Neville. How were your hols?" Ron asked, sitting next to Seanmus.

"F-Fine, thanks."

"Okay, um… Me 'n Harry verses Ron 'n Neville," Seanmus said.

"No way! Me and Harry or no game," Ron replied.

"Oh, a'ight."

And so the game began. After a long, grueling match which took most of the trip, Neville got dealt a horrible hand and lost the game for himself and Seanmus.

"Ugh! Neville! What 'ere you thinkin'?" Seanmus yelled loudly enough to wake Dean.

"Wazzat?" Dean mumbled.

"We're almost at Hogwarts."

"I'll tell you what you owe us later," Harry said to Seanmus before following Ron out the door.

"Us, Harry? No, he owes you. You were brilliant. I didn't do anything," Ron said.

"If you say so…"

Immediately following the Sorting and the feast, Dumbledore gave his usual speech to the students – but meant especially for the first years. Harry tuned most of it out because if was all so familiar, but when Dumbledore began talking about arranging more social activities for the students in the coming year, Harry's ears perked up.

"… Included in these events will be such things as a costume party for Halloween, a Christmas ball, a New Year's Eve carnival and so on and so forth. I wish that you all attend and enjoy these coming festivities. Now, if you'll all join me in the Hogwarts Song, we'll return to our long vacant dormitories and settle in."

Once in Gryffindor common room, Harry caught up with Seanmus.

"Seanmus, I've figured out what you owe me," Harry said, catching Ron's eye.

"What's that?" Seanmus asked, somewhat bewildered.

"Well, if you'll step into my office, we'll discus it."

"What are you bloody talking about?"

Ron took one of Seanmus's arms and Harry took the other. "Let's go for a walk, my friend."

On their walk amongst the halls, Harry explained his plan to his friends.

"Okay, so I may be 'the boy who lived' but I am very shy around girls. You know that, right?"

"So?" Ron and Seanmus said simultaneously.

"So I figure… Seanmus isn't shy around girls… and he owes me… So he can help me out a bit…"

"How?"

"Well there's this thing called a Polyjuice potion, and –"

"No, no and NO!" Seanmus exclaimed. "I will absolutely NOT impersonate you."

"You do owe him, Finnigan," Ron said, "But what do you have in mind, Harry?"

"The costume party. We'll be in costume, but doubly. Seanmus will go as me being someone and I will go as Seanmus being someone. It will take the focus off of our impersonations being perfect since we're not supposed to act like ourselves."

Seanmus thought for a moment. "Well that sounds easy enough… Okay, I'll do it. Who's the girl?"

Harry looked at Ron. "Ginny."

Ron's ears turned red. "Harry –" he whined.

"Ron –" Harry whined back.

"I said I'd do it, let's go plot!" Seanmus said, leading the way back to Gryffindor Tower.

Little did they know, someone had been listening…

Draco Malfoy was happy. Oh so happy. This year was going to be the best year yet. The term wasn't even a day old and he already had a plan to mess with the mind of his arch enemy, the oh-so-special Muggle and Mudblood lover, Harry Potter.

Entering the Slytherin Common room, he spotted his favorite mindless goons.

"Crabe, Goyle, get over hear now!" he yelled, snapping his fingers.

"What is it, Draco?"

Malfoy smirked. "Potter has so many little victories on his battle chart… But I'm out to win the war."

"What?" Goyle asked.

"Listen, you bumbling idiot! I have information that will lead me to a plan that will rip Potter's happiness out from beneath his fingertips. Now are you in or should I find someone else who would be of more help?"

"No, we'll help, we promise!"

"Just tell us what we need to do!"

"Okay, so the story is thus: Potter is infatuated with the daughter of that redheaded Muggle lover."

"Who?"

"Weasley, Arthur _Weasley_, you buffoon!"

"Oh, right."

"As I was saying, Potter fancies her. I overheard that bloody prat talking to the redheaded twit and the stupid Irishman from Gryffindor."

"Wait he told Weasley that he liked –"

"No the redheaded twit is her brother, the one with the rat who's always tagging along after Potter like a two year old afraid to leave his mummy."

"Oh."

"Like I was saying, I dislike Potter, so thus dislike anything that would make him happy. So, now we must devise a plan – or rather, I'll come up with what you two are going to do, and you'll do it – to make sure he's not happy. Come, let's discus…"


	2. Chapter 2

**Act Two**

"I can't believe it's already Halloween!" Hermione said, putting the final touches on the hem of her costume with a flick of her wand.

"How did you do that?" Ginny asked amazed.

"Textile spells are very simple. I could teach you sometime if you want to learn."

"Sure. So who are you supposed to be again?"

Hermione blushed. "I'm going as Beatrice from one of Shakespeare's plays."

"Spakesheare? Who's that?" Ginny asked, trying to pin up her hair.

"William Shakespeare. He was a Muggle who was a brilliant poet and playwright. The most famous British playwright of all time, in fact. He wrote 11 plays along with various other works."

"So who is this Beatrice?"

"Beatrice is a woman who gets tricked into falling in love with a man she argues with often by her cousin and her cousin's servants. They stage a conversation for her to overhear in which they mention this man loves her – but really he doesn't, they're tricking her – but say they can't tell her for fear that she'll reject him."

"Hm… Arguing… that sounds so familiar…" Ginny said under her breath.

"What?" Hermione asked, picking up her gown.

"Oh, I was just wondering where you learned that."

"We're reading it in Muggle studies. Here, can you help me with the ties in the back?"

"Sure."

Meanwhile, in the boys' dormitory, Harry and Seanmus were preparing for their own masquerade.

"Okay, so it's finished," Seanmus said, looking at the cauldron full of Polyjuice potion that sat between himself and Harry.

"Not quite. Poor yourself a glass," Harry said, pulling out a Swiss army knife that wasn't very sharp.

"What are you doing?" Seanmus asked.

"You need hair, Seanmus," Ron said, taking the knife from Harry. "Hair from the person you're impersonating."

"There's no way I'm letting you hack at my hair!"

"He's not hacking, just cutting off a bit. Here, watch, he'll do me first," Harry said, sitting on the chair in front of Ron. Ron to a lock of Harry's hair and slowly brought the knife across it, and putting a few hairs into Seanmus's potion, which turned a smart shade of green.

"Do you have any idea how disturbing that is?" he asked, but reluctantly let Ron cut some of his hair to put into Harry's glass.

"On three, okay mate?"

"Whatever you say. If this kills me, you owe my mam a big apology!"

"Okay. One..." Harry started.

"Two…" said Seanmus.

"Three!" they both exclaimed and chugged their potion.

"Oh that's so gross," said Seanmus putting down his finished glass before Harry's was half gone. "Ha. Englishmen have no stomachs for drinking."

Before each other's eyes, the two boys seemed to gradually switch places. First their hair, then their hands, and everything leading up to Harry's scar finally being transported to Seanmus's – who now looked like Harry – forehead.

"It worked! And we didn't even have to get Hermione's help!" Ron exclaimed with a whoop.

Seanmus and Harry stared at each other.

"Well what are you waiting for? Get in costume or we'll be late!" Ron said.

"Um, I definitely was so caught up in the potion that I forgot to make a costume," Harry said sheepishly.

"Same here, mate…"

Ron laughed. "Lucky for you two I asked Nearly Headless Nick for some help and he showed me this awesome secret attic you get to from the common room. It had tons of stuff in it, but I just grabbed a random trunk and brought it down. Take a look."

After finding adequate ensembles, Harry, Ron and Seanmus sprinted to the Great Hall, which had been cleared to hold the party. Most of the students were standing along the walls, talking and laughing, generally enjoying themselves. A few stragglers continued to flow in, one or two at time. A band was set up on the plat form, and a few students were dancing.

Harry elbowed Seanmus. "Look, there's Ginny," he said, pointing.

"Where?"

Ron and Seanmus followed Harry's finger to a group of girls talking. One of them, dressed entirely in black that stood out strikingly against her red hair, was Ginny Weasley.

"Go on," Harry hissed, shoving Seanmus towards them.

"Mate, I don't know about this…"

"Seanmus Finnigan –"

"Oh alright, I'm going. What do I do?"

"You're the romantic, you figure it out."

Seanmus made his way over to the group of girls, who immediately began giggling hysterically. He cleared his throat and walked up to Ginny. "Uh, hullo, Ginny."

"Hullo, Harry. Who are you supposed to be?" Ginny asked with a smile.

Seanmus stopped in his tracks. Who had Ron told him that he was again? He gazed down at his array of torn leather and black cloth. "Um… I'm…I'm… King Arthur. That's right, King Arthur."

"Oh, that Muggle that Merlin kept helping, right?"

"Yeah, that's the one. And who are you portraying tonight?"

"Nimue, Merlin's lover. That's pretty funny that we're both supposed to be connected with Merlin."

"Yeah, it is." Seanmus scratched the back of his neck. "Um, Ginny, um… Do you wanna dance?"

"That would be wonderful, Harry," she said, taking his hand.

"Well, mate, have fun, I think Seanmus knows what he's doing. I'll catch up with you later," Ron said, finally leaving Harry's side. He followed Seanmus's path over to the group of Gryffindor girls.

"Well if it isn't Ron," Hermione said with a laugh.

"Who are you talking to, madam? I know no Ronald."

"Ah, forgive me, I was mistaken. You are but a jester."

"What? I am no such thing!" Ron exclaimed, utterly outraged.

"What are you then, _Ronald_?" Hermione asked, putting emphasis on his name.

"I am Lancelot DuLac. I'll have you know that I –"

"Ron, just shut up and dance with me."

Meanwhile, the real Harry was sampling punch while he watched his friends dance. Seanmus had Ginny laughing a lot, and Ron kept stepping on Hermione's toes so it was somewhat amusing. Then someone accidentally elbowed Harry and sent his punch flying down his front.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Seanmus. Please forgive my clumsiness."

Harry turned to see Malfoy and Goyle standing next to him, one with a smirk on his face and the other with a blank stare.

"Oh, hullo Malfoy," Harry spat out, trying to imitate Seanmus's accent."

Malfoy laughed. "Come on, my friend, it's a party, be happy. Actually, I wanted to talk to you, Seanmus… or should I say _Potter_?" he whispered.

"How… How did you know?" Harry asked, flabbergasted.

"Oh, I have to say, you two are bloody brilliant. Seanmus told us all about it. The perfect costume; Polyjuice potion. Ginny absolutely died."

Harry felt like he was going to be sick. "He told Ginny?"

"Oh, of course. I think she likes him, actually. They are very cute together. Look," Malfoy said, pointing to the two of them on the dance floor, Ginny's head on Seanmus's – who still looked like Harry – shoulder. "Well, I guess I'll be going then. Have a nice time, Potter."

Harry slid to the floor and hid under the refreshment table. Seanmus… the traitor. He owed Harry. What was he thinking? Ugh!

"Harry? Harry what's the matter?"

Harry looked up to see Ron and himself – oh wait, it was Seanmus – crawling towards him under the table.

"I saw you talking to Malfoy and figured it must mean trouble so I came to see what happened."

"Oh Mate, Ginny absolutely –"

"Traitor!" Harry hissed. "You owed me and you –"

"And she totally fell in love with you, Harry Potter."

Harry was confused. "What?"

"She loves you. I think she was about ready to jump me. Seriously, if you ask her, she'll go out with you in a heartbeat," Seanmus said with a smile.

"You mean you didn't tell her?" Harry asked.

"No, of course not. I owed you, remember?"

"If everything's okay, I'm going to go annoy Hermione some more. See ya later," Ron said, leaving Seanmus and Harry alone under the table.

"He likes her. It's so obvious."

"Hey, he was on my team. You owe him too. Help me set him and Hermione up?"

"Deal," Seanmus replied, taking Harry's hand to seal the agreement.

Malfoy was angry. His plan hadn't worked. That stupid Irishman had told Potter what had really happened before Potter had punched him out or cursed him. And to top that all off, Potter had actually gotten up enough courage – after three weeks of her flirting with him – to ask that Weasley wench out and she had said yes. So the two of them were often seen prancing around the castle, happy as can be. This made Draco very unhappy.

Right now his mind was drawing a blank on what to do to fix this problem. Crabe and Goyle weren't being any help. Were they ever? No but they were loyal.

Draco looked at his two goonies. Crabe looked like he had a toothache and Goyle kept blinking absentmindedly.

"Are you two even trying to think of a plan?" he asked.

"Um, yeah, I –" Goyle muttered.

"UGH! Those stupid Gryffindors! If they hadn't made that stupid Polyjuice potion, none of this would have –"

"Wait!" Malfoy exclaimed, banging his fists on the table. "I have it!"

"Have what?" asked Goyle.

"The plan to ruin Potter's happiness, you moron! We'll Polyjuice someone to look like that Weasley brat and then make it look like she's cheating on Potter!"

"That's brilliant!"

"Come, let's recruit some Potter haters to help us out."

That night, Ron had pulled his bed curtains tight around his bed so he could study for his Magical History test tomorrow. He had been there for about an hour and was about to fall asleep when he heard Harry and Seanmus come into the dorm.

"Where's Ron?" he heard Harry ask.

"I think he's asleep."

"Good, because I need to talk to you –"

"Wait, let me check first," Seanmus said, walking towards Ron's bed. Ron quickly closed his eyes and feigned sleep. Seanmus, however, peaked through the curtains in just enough time to see Ron's eyes close. "Yeah, he's asleep," Seanmus lied, winking at Harry.

"We need to talk. About Ron and Hermione."

"Ron… and Hermione?"

"Yeah. Hermione likes Ron. A lot. Ginny told me."

"You mean… _like _likes him?"

"Yeah. I mean, think about it. She talks about him all the time."

"We should tell him."

"No, we can't!" Harry said. "He'll laugh at her. I don't think he'd believe we were serious."

"Good point. He can be somewhat cold hearted sometimes. And she's probably joking anyway."

"Trust me, it's no joke. Have you seen the way she looks at him? But she'll never tell him. It's Hermione, and she sticks to what she's good at: books and good marks."

"You're right. Well, I hope it passes quickly then, cuz when she's depressed, we don't get as many points. I hope this doesn't affect the House Cup for us," Seanmus said, hearing Neville and Dean coming up the stairs. 'Suppose it's time for bed, don't you? The others are coming."

"Right. Goodnight, Seanmus."

"'night, Harry."

Ron lay in his bed as his fellow Gryffindors drifted to sleep, pondering what he'd just heard. Hermione loved him? They'd heard from Ginny, so it must be true. She was very annoying, but Ginny was honest, and wouldn't lie about one of her friends. So Hermione loved him, but didn't want to tell him for fear of rejection.

'_I'll prove them all wrong_," Ron thought. '_I'm not cold hearted at all. I would be not to love Hermione. But I will. I'll love her_.' He smiled. '_Just wait 'til you see, Harry, how wrong you were about your best mate…_'


End file.
